it's almost done. It may look dark- but now it needs to get distressed and put on old postcard paper- and creased.   I have to go to the store!

It's not your eyes- it's intentionally blurry... it's an old photograph...  or maybe it's me.

Rome is burning..I didn't fiddle tho! sleep... zzzzz

Rome will be finished before I go to bed sometime tomorrow morning...

Rome wasn't built in a day......

 

How are things shaping up.... very slowly. We're seeping Sepia over here...

The Smiley Family in action

All day I drew this! Oy Vey!

I have been working on this story for two years. It's near and dear to my heart. It's not an easy family nor an easy story to tell. At it's heart is Baby Gail, the little big eyed girl on the left. It's her story and it's a story of a quiet person who's in the background of a family of very, very aggressive personalities who do big things. The simple act of this little person documenting the family history in a big 'ol photo album and passing it on may just be the biggest thing anyone in The Smiley Family has ever done.


The color in the story changes from sepia to gorgeous black and white to full color- as photography does. It helps the passage of time.

My studio is wall papered with this family. Generation after generation. Til now- I have done portraits mostly. I have some candid pics. The 1960's which I was drawing last, get pretty fun.  Over many years,
I have amassed a huge collection of old photographs and albums. This project grew out of my unending love of old stuff. Old clothes, old photos, times gone by- and the death of my Grandmother.

I hadn't put that last part together until recently. I think it's my way to rewrite the end of her life. My character is not her, but it's a character that is content with the way things play out.



I've gotten a lot of good feedback on the illustrations. It's now my task to finish the story. Baby Gail deserves that much.


 Lower word count - 700 being the sweet spot, means more story in the pictures. This sketch was an attempt at that.

Now to paint!

Color Study:

The 3 P's

The 3 P's of Success!!!

 

Ok - Passion: CHECK! Got it! 

 

Persistence! CHECK! - refer to post about Frank Sinatra song below.

I pick myself up and get back in the race.

 

Patience?... Well, that's harder. That's relative.  I am both patient and impatient. You all get that right?

OK- back to work. End of the illustrator's P.S.A. for

today.

Whadda'ya doin' Kelly?

Tryin' to cram a whole lotta art out in the last week before LA?

Just cause it's new - does that mean it's good?

It's existential art crisis time here in the Light Studio.

Hazy Crazy Summer

All Prep for SCBWI  LA was stopped for a week as my computer died, freelance spot illos (above) called and Summer came along and whacked me in the head - literally - migraines.  

My last minute postcard is off to the printer today.Fingers crossed all that it gets here by August 3d!!!

We now return to our regularly scheduled art cram......

Hey!?  Can a girl get some sodas and pretzels and beer?!?

Tootsie popping

How many bad drawings does it take to get to a good drawing? The world may never know.


Image of How many licks

Louise Took it

Up there on the header? Louise! - by a landslide...  I decided to keep her name and her hair. She is who she is.  Now, let's tell her story.

Main Character Smack Down! Vote for Winner

Ok- We have reached the pivotal moment. Who will be the main character? Who do you think best represents the character?

Character traits again:

2nd grader
Art enthusiast- like a Pokemon fanatic but with all things artsy fartsy
Needs to come across as kooky yet sweet and appealing

OK! Let me know what you think... as I thumbnail....

Final Contender : Norma

Character Challenger: Louise!!!

First Up: Jessie Poses

Battle Round!

 

On to BATTLE ROUND!

Louise and Jessie were the clear winners of the first 2 rounds. 

Norma surprised many. Was it the blue hair? The china flats? Watch this one - she may yet take it.

They were not my first choices- but I am trusting in the educated tastes of my com-padres... as I tend to like drawing less appealing  characters. It's a good lesson for me.

Now I will give them each 3 pose suggestions.

1. Exclaiming "I LOVE IT!"

2. In class desk top doodling

3. important pose from double page spread - reveling in art

Off to draw!

Casting Call - Round 2

So Far it Looks like Louise is the winner of Round 1. (named after Louise Nevelson)

The next candidates for your consideration are up.

More about the "part". A second grader who is crazy about art. Crazy as in eats. sleeps, breathes it.
She is a cross between Edna Mode/ Dieter from Sprockets and Tabitha from Salon Takeover on Bravo and the chick from Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World.  She's a loveable KOOK. Not sweet - but fun. An individual that maybe not all of the kids "get"- but her passion is infectious.


OK- Here we go on my feelings:

Norma: You have the coolest Mom cause she let you dye your hair. You let your freak flag fly.

Mary: You suffer from the common misconception that art is "fashionable". Tho- nice hair.  I like the mod edge.

Jessie: You are the one doodling on every single scrap of paper and test. Maybe you are the quiet artiste- not the gallery curator.

 The part is for the kid that can lead a group of kids to put on an art show. Pick the character that you can hear yelling, arms in the air...."I LOVE IT!" - over and over. 

OK - Vote someone in or out of the book. The top 3 will come to call backs and I'll do a few character poses for the final pick.

PS She will most likely wear the striped shirt - they all have a thing for striped french sailor tees- it's them, really ;)

Casting Call !

Designing characters for a mini-book I'm doing for Promo out in L.A.

Main character is a 2nd grade Art Enthusiast. She can rattle off names like Caravaggio and Modigliani  faster than most boys can say "Pickachu".

The first 3 characters up for consideration:

Georgia: I'm sorry. You're just not cool enough. You're trying too hard. You will be considered for a classmate, sans beret.

Louise: I like you. You have the Etsy Girl/ nerdy thing going for you. Just, maybe, not enough ego.

Andie: So far, You are the front runner. You've got the look and the swagger. Also, Andy Warhol thinks you should have your 15 minutes.

Next Group!

I invite Voting in the comments!! It's like a reality TV Competition!

That's Life!

That's life
That's what all the people say
You're riding high in April
Shot down in May
But I know I'm gonna change that tune
When I'm back on top, back on top in June

I said that's life
And as funny as it may seem
Some people get their kicks
Stomping on a dream
But I don't let it, let it get me down
'Cause this fine old world
It keeps spinning around

I've been a puppet, a pauper,
A pirate, a poet,
A pawn and a king,
I've been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing
Each time I find myself
Flat on my face
I pick myself up and get back in the race

That's life
I tell you, I can't deny it
I thought of quitting baby
But my heart just ain't gonna buy it
And if I didn't think it was worth one single try
I'd jump right on a big bird
And then I'd fly

I've been a puppet, a pauper,
A pirate, a poet,
A pawn and a king,
I've been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing
Each time I find myself laying
Flat on my face
I just pick myself up and get back in the race

That's life
That's life, and I can't deny it
Many times I thought of cutting out
But my heart won't buy it
But if there nothing shaking coming this here July
I'm going to pick my pencil back up and give it ..

another TRY!
My my...

I floated in the pool today as this song played from the fake rock speakers...

By the end of the song I was singing at the top of my lungs -- smacking the water to emphasize each line.

Especially this line:

I thought of quitting baby - But my heart just ain't gonna buy it

And this line:

Each time I find myself
Flat on my face
I pick myself up and get back in the race

Today's Theme Song. I changed the last line. There's no rolling up in a ball and dying with this broad, Frank. 

Do you dream in character?

I do dream in character. Last night I dreamt Eureka Jones. Where this stuff comes from? Who knows?
I remember her - I remember "Camp Comonahockalugie" and I remember a cliff hanger.....

Anyone else get ideas in dreams?

It Gets Better

As a person who knows what it feels like to have their head slammed into a locker, or pushed under the bathroom sink or to be pulled into the cloak room to be groped in sixth grade; The "It gets Better" campaign hits home. The bullies weren't stronger than my belief in myself.

Have you seen this video? Very touching words from the Kid Lit community.

http://youtu.be/kYRYpYyHMos

It does get better. I held on to who I knew I was. Hold on to yourself.

Always Let you conscience be your guide...

When you get in trouble and you don't know right from wrong
Give a little whistle!  Give a little whistle!
When you meet temptation and the urge is very strong
Give a little whistle!  Give a little whistle!

Not just a little squeak, pucker up and blow
And if your whistle's weak, yell, "Jiminy Cricket!"
Right!

Take the straight and narrow path
And if you start to slide
Give a little whistle!  Give a little whistle!
And always let your conscience be your guide"

I made a tough decision this week. Truthfully- it took months to make this decision. 

Even when I had made up my mind, the final declaration of that decision - just

scared the crap out of me.

I left my agent. I wish him well.

I'm off to pursue publication solo again. I believe in myself. Making the tough decisions

only reinforces that belief. 

That little voice in your head; your conscience - it yells sometimes. 

"And always let your conscience be your guide" 

An away we go.

Spotlight on me- over in Jersey...

Kathy Temean, who is the head of N.J. SCBWI has featured me on her "Illustrator Saturday" blog post.

It's nice to visit on other blogs!  Check it out!- Happy Fathers day all Fathers, especially my own Dad and my husband!! Here's my "Sketchables "Fathers Day sketch.....

NJ Shout Outs

I wanted to shout out the Art Showcase winners from the NJ SCBWI Conference. There was a lot of great work on display and if you read this blog- you know... I find these competitions not unlike ultimate cage fighting. -;)

The winner :
Lisa Falkenstern Whose work is truly inspiring. Heck- she paints in oil. AND- she's damn good at it.

Runners Up:
Katia Wish Katia is making her mark. She has a unique style and she works a great deal of movement into her illustrations. I'd keep my eye on her if I were you....

Here's Katia's post about the conference - which reminded me to post this info on my own blog. Thanks Katia for being on the ball!

Oh yeah- Me too.  I put in my Hippo For Hire piece. I didn't bring a separate piece of art for the showcase, I thought our homework was going in to the show. When I realized this Friday night, I called the husband and he drove 3 hours round trip to bring me whatever I had a decent print of at home. I chose the Hippo cause - well, Don't we all look at our portfolios and have a few that we say- "OK- I can be a bad ass illustrator!"? - This one says that to me.

So I guess the judges agreed.

 Honorable mention went to: Kim Wood (If anyone has a link - let me know) She did a sweet illustration of a mouse learning karate.

These three illustrators are really great. To be grouped with them is a compliment. Congrats to all of them!

Jersey Girl

 I thought maybe a good way to recap the NJ SCBWI conference would be to just show my notes in my sketchbook. I scribble down chicken scratch sound bites and doodle thru the days.

 

Friday's intensive

 Martha Rago's session on Al Yankovic's great book "When I Grow Up" Illustrated by Wes Hargis.
I do this- do you? Dissect the layouts of a successful PB - break down the shapes and how they work the page.

 

I'm not editing my words here- sometimes I get bored, or have a difference of opinion.

This was was a Children's Book Market evaluation.

 

 I had an epiphany @ Leeza's first workshop... submitting to TV. - Frying Pan moment

 Leeza's second workshop- I think is what needs to be taken to greater SCBWI. The ins and outs of promotional branding and what gives you that "Hey I know my Sh*T" look. (my words- not hers)

 The last day an agents panel was again- a great learning moment. The role of agents, the relationship with agents is like the movie Inception. I need a spinny thing.... And that one agent- looked like she walked out of a painting from about 1780.

I hope you can glean something from these messy pages. It was a really good conference. Even the bugs in my room agreed.

Hooked on a Feelin'

I went to the NJ SCBWI conference this weekend. It was a really great conference. If the NY and the LA are out of reach- consider this as an alternative.

I had a fun time. I had a great crit. I had some exciting feedback. I met some publishing people who were very nice and interesting and kind.  I came away with good stuff happening.

And the need to get very, very busy.

A conference is like a Happy Twilight Zone. You disappear into that reality for a long weekend, where time and space no longer matter. Your moving through space armed only with your imagination, skills and a smile. The part of Rod Serling is 99% likely played by a woman.... say Leeza Hernandez...

So I can't really put into words how I feel today - so listen to the songs.

And maybe join me in my own meditation of repeating my old adage:

  The Schlemeil Schlimazel

Give us any chance, we'll take it.
Give us any rule, we'll break it.
We're gonna make our dreams come true.
Doin' it our way.

Nothin's gonna turn us back now,
Straight ahead and on the track now.
We're gonna make our dreams come true,
Doin' it our way.

There is nothing we won't try,
Never heard the word impossible.
This time there's no stopping us.
We're gonna do it.

On your mark, get set, and go now,
Got a dream and we just know now,
We're gonna make our dream come true.
And we'll do it our way, yes our way.
Make all our dreams come true,
And do it our way, yes our way,
Make all our dreams come true
For me and you.

Taking a moment before I start a summer of selling myself....

It's like being an actor. You have to audition and audition, give your best audition for the right part, be right for the part, in front of the right director for the right movie- at the right time. And we all know how many actors wait tables. That is how I described what I do today.

Momentum in art is like Mario Kart

We have Mario Kart for the Wii. I find it very, very stressful. On some level, it's proof that I should never have passed driver's ed. (especially after driving over that divider on route 22 in NJ).

In Mario Kart- you try to go as fast as you can. The driving requires quick reflexes - great eye hand coordination and a steady heart. You try to get around the obstacles while performing at your best. There is a moment when you feel the  'groove'- you are careening along... passing your opponents... going fast, hitting turbo boost...  when some big, black, too cute bullet explodes your Yoshi. You try to make it to the finish line without loosing all of your lives and while scoring the most points. After that- you try to get on the "List". The high scorers page.

This is my metaphor for today. I try to ride the momentum of life. I try to use the momentum of one project to the next to be in that "groove". But things in life do explode my Yoshi.

It is almost June. June! The careening around avoiding my obstacles tends to make life fly by just like that Coconut Mall in the game. Deadlines were met last month. Spring holidays and birthdays are past. We lost a loved one. Now, Summer kicks off this weekend. One event leads to the next - head down at the drawing board makes me forget objects in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are. They are all there and it's all coming up so fast.

I am going to SCBWI NJ next week. I just finished a new postcard.

  

The idea came from my daughter's friend saying "One day we will all drive donuts"

-then it was a sketch over @ The Sketchables.

I am now redoing my homework. We were given the assignment to choose a manuscript. Take one passage and sketch a double page spread. The sketch gets turned in to an actual art director, member of the faculty. Their feedback comes back to you- then you take it to final art, present it at the conference and get feedback/judging. 

Here is the passage I picked:

"’Cause maybe I’ll be a gorilla masseuse Or an artist who sculpts out of chocolate mousse Or a rodeo clown or a great film director Or maybe professional pickle inspector Or big sumo wrestler or hedge fund investor Or smelly pit-sniffing deodorant tester"

I rushed this. I did it in one evening- after weekend guests left Easter Weekend. There are things I like a lot about it : the gestures - the life in the drawings. Things I don't like: the composition. So- the feedback came in and pretty much nailed me to the wall... good feedback, true feedback is not like a frying pan to the face - it's like Mario Kart also. When you play the game and make the same wrong turn over and over again... and you yell "WHY DO I KEEP DOING THAT!?" - The real feedback yells that at you and you know it's true. - Yoshi explodes. Start over.

"Dynamic,playful and eye-catching layout. Good gesture and sense of action in spots. But  I have an issue with the order and rhythm of the images. So much going on it is not clear what to look at first and in what order.What should I look at first, how do you want my eye to move across  the page? Think about the hierarchy of the images on this spread and  what you want the viewer to see first, second etc. Size of the images  and how they fit together as well as the shape of each will dictate  that. If eyes move left to right over the page, use a  progression of  sizes to direct my gaze,  make the text flow in a logical way in the correct order so its not misread. In the end the images need to work  together  as a whole and not just as separate discreet spots

Also, think about the whole book: With a lot of text, very few spreads can  be handled this way or you will end up with a 60 page book! so be  selective about what you show and make sure the images count for the real estate they take up."

Ok- So- I'm reworking now.  I will try to avoid my usual obstacles.. as I build momentum on my journey through Coconut Mall on my way to the finish line in Los Angeles this summer. My goal- new art, new portfolio... hoping to get on that high scorers page. "C'mon Yoshi... hit the gas."

Nana Gerri

Nana Gerri - my husband's Grandmother passed away this morning. There was no designing this "character"  - Nana was one of a kind. Nana Gerri, Thanks for never making me feel like a shiksa wife and for all of the Yiddish I learned from you. A Brooklyn Bubeleh for the ages.
There is one more bright, sparkly, appliqued star in the sky now. 

Rainy Days and Mondays

 

Monday was never Dad's favorite day-

this one especially was extra dark gray.

Business was bad, meetings were planned.

Off to work Dad went - briefcase in hand.

Grumbling and groaning , he did complain,

"The last thing I needed today was rain."

He didn't notice it as he pulled it out of his case..

the umbrella he usually used had been replaced.

His daughter had wanted to brighten his day,

as soon as it opened- his cares went away.

He'd tackle this day with a smile on his face,

His head was now in a pink stripey place.

A spring in his step and a warm fuzzy heart,

His day was now off to a much better start.

I actually saw this guy this morning as I drove to the gym. I was myself grumbling and groaning and feeling quite blah. I bet that little umbrella worked it's magic on lots of people!

THIS WEEK'S THEME SONG

Let's all move that rubber tree plant!

Hello Blogger- Are you feeling better now?

Blogger was down. I have been neglecting this blog- caught up in work, life, exercise, facebook, twitter...feeling like I want to junk all I've done and start fresh, new website, new blog, new exciting things out there now...... and then blogger goes down.
What if it was gone forever. All of those posts? 4 years of my life- the proof of my journey- woosh! gone! This blog was my toe dip into the water after staying home with a kid for five years.

Well - PHEW! It's back and I've heard I can download it and save it- that I did not know. So- Blogger, I am glad you are better.

The end

The last painting to do. - and I feel like the lady on the right...

closing in on the end..

Close to the end of the book... things get sticky.

and so I'm still painting.....

It's like a marathon. Halfway....

For The Love of the Game

I have been to the Norman Rockwell Museum five times. I used to go once a year- like a pilgrimage to Mecca. It was my way to stay connected to art, while I was a stay at home Mom, not producing any art of my own. I thought I knew all I could about this artist I loved. I was wrong.

 New sparks flew as I walked the Norman Rockwell exhibit: Norman Rockwell: Behind the Camera

@ The Brooklyn Museum  exhibit 2 weeks ago. 

The exhibit was a look into Norman's process. 

Norman's - brain.

 

As I stood - my eyes:feasting, my heart: pitter pattering at the glimpse into his way of thinking and doing things, these words entered my brain,

"For the Love of the Game".

So the phrase is from baseball. Years and years ago- baseball players played because they loved playing. I'm sure, even today, all over the minor leagues, and sprinkled throughout the majors, you will find many who still do. Those who would play for peanuts. Those who would play for nothing. Those to whom throwing, fielding, hitting, catching- are like breathing.

Norman loved the game.

The game of Illustration.

Norman could be seen in some of the reference photos- just at the edge of the frame.. laughing, smiling - acting for the kid's in the pictures. Norman was prolific in his preparation. He did more than he had to and wound up not using a lot of his prep work. Lost in the process- he'd go more than the extra mile to see what would work better in an illustration.

Norman walked away from the Saturday Evening Post when he wanted to continue to reflect America's attitude in his work. His young man's optimism and the country's own optimism gave way in the second half of the twentieth century. Norman's attitude had changed along with America's as the 50's turned into the 60's. He made a choice to follow his instinct. Norman evolved.

Norman vocalized doubts about his own work. As he grew older, he questioned what value his career held. What contribution he made. How good was he?

He compared his work to others. He had moments of feeling "less than".

Yet - Norman painted and drew until he became too old and ill to. Norman went on to see the Brooklyn Museum hold the very first retrospective of his work in 1974. 

Whenever I hear that an artist that I admire- idolize even, doubts their own skill, my initial reaction is that it's hard to believe. How could they be so good and not realize it? It even pains me a little. 

Norman Rockwell? Self Doubter?

Then, it humanizes. I have self doubt. I compare my work to others. I question what value is there in what I create? - So I go back to thinking of the commonalities- the thrill of the process, the fun of the figuring it all out - The Love of the Game. Artists like Norman Rockwell inspire not just in the beauty of the end result- the illustration, but in the life they lived, the way they lived it - the way they moved through their lives as a creative.

I've done it for peanuts. I'd draw for nothing. The pencil and the paper are the bread and water for my soul. I love the game. Batter up.

The exhibit ends April 10th in Brooklyn! 

The museum in Stockbridge, MA is a national treasure!

Another blog about Norman from a talented painter I went to college with.

Underpaintings

Another GREAT blog "Today's Inspiration"  - about Norman

Busy busy

working on this..... only bigger and in color. Plus many more pages.....

Today Everbody's Irish - even me

That is a family picture. That is my Great, Great Grandmother, Mary Elizabeth McNamara - Maher . Next to her is my Grandmother, "Dottie".  That imposing woman - (can't you just feel her?) - came from Ireland in 1892 with every penny she possessed sewn into the hem of that voluminous skirt of hers. Dottie, her granddaughter, was the daughter of an Irish woman who was the widow of Irishman James O'Farrell with one child, who became a governess to an English man, William Hunter, who was a widower with, I think, 8 kids of his own. So Dottie was half Irish, half English.

That's about as far as it goes for the pure Irish Family history. Dottie married a Polish man - Leo Rosenski, had my Mom who married my Dad, half Italian, half Brazilian..... and produced me - a mutt. I am the sum of the Immigration Experience.  And what did I go and do? I married a Jewish boy! - Ain't that America?

So in my family- the looks range from olive skinned, dark haired lovelies to pale- pale- pale......me.
This is why I identify so strongly as being Irish. It's the only thing that showed up on the outside. I have an Italian stomach- Brazilian rhythm and a Polish sense of direction(I kid). My face - has been smacked with a shillelagh.

Countless times in my life- I have had strangers look at me- stare and say "OH.... She has the map of Ireland on her face." - which is kinda nice to hear to a kid who had such a mixed up background. I'm not well grounded in Irish traditions- I know much more about my Brazilain heritage and the Italian food. I went to Brazil @ 17. It was a life changing experience to stand on ground that you know your people came from. - But everyone (and everyone there is gorgeous) called me "linda gringo" and I spontaneously combusted from all of the sun. This is me - in front of Jesus' gigantic toe in Rio- contemplating how grateful I am for the clouds that day.

I ate my way thru Italy on a highschool tour - gazed at the stylish beautiful people and spontaneously combusted from all of the sun.

I have put off my dream trip to the Emerald Isle for 10 years. I am close to making it a reality, I can feel it in my bones. I want to stand on that ground and see the green hills and the rocky coast. I want to breathe the air- and have my skin feel at home. I want to see where Mary Elizabeth McNamara had her farm that she sold to have the money she sewed into the hem of her skirt.
I suppose it's a longing to belong to something. Some tangible proof that it's not just my face - but maybe something deeper will connect.

I can't rattle on in Gaelic or sing IRA protest songs. I didn't have a Aran sweater  til my husband bought me one, which I had a violent allergic reaction to the wool - and can't wear. It's nice to look at tho. I'm the human equivalent of a bottle of O'douls to all of you  Guinness pint people.

But I offer you this as proof of Irishness......

I danced the jig in 3rd grade with my dance school. I got in the front row. Cause I was so freakin' Irish looking.

It's the freckles. My Grandmother had them. She had more freckles than there are stars in the sky. As She got older that freckled skin turned translucent- and it looked like the freckles danced on top of a pool of water. Now that I'm getting older - I see it happening to me.

I shall freckle til the day I leave this earth- maybe they'll merge and I'll finally look tan instead of spontaneously combusting - from the sun.

Happy St Pat's Everyone! Happy Day to be Irish! No matter how much or how little! 

 We're doing the Green Thing Over @ The Sketchables too this week!